Tuesday, 12 February 2013

How Cool is your Ramen?

Image from Tonkotsu's website

There's been a lot about noodle soup in the past few months. And so many varieties. I can barely read a publication without it being mentioned. 

The question is, are you eating what's cool?

1. What sort of noodles are in your soup?
a) Udon. They're hand-pulled* that day, to an ancient Japanese recipe. By a geisha, probably.
b) Don't really care. They're all the same.
c) Ramen, of course. It's so now.

2. The service?
a) Pretty friendly. Almost apologetic, and whispering.
b) Trained down to the last detail. They scribble all over your menu.
c) Brusque and rude, which is perfect, because it gives your review a negative angle.

3. How pimped up is your noodle soup?
a) No extras, but the specials they post on Twitter are pretty 'pimp'.
b) I think there's some chilli oil on the tables...
 c) You can add pipettes of fat and humorously named bits of fried chicken

4. What about sides?
a) Tempura prawns and vegetables.
b) Chilli squid. That's pretty edgy, right?
c) Fried chicken, donuts and popcorn, of course!

5. Who will your dining companions be?
a) People who know where to get the real deal.
b) Your parents, anyone you're not trying to impress.
c) Your cool hipster mates. No need to talk, too busy instagramming.

6. You are drinking:
a) An artisan Japanese beer.
b) Free, refillable green tea.
c) Sake that you probably can't afford.

7. Music:
a) Traditional ambient Japanese music.
b) The sound of millions of other drones chatting.
c) Full-volume rock so you can Shazam that cool track without moving.

8. Did you pay?
a) You went to the soft launch, so you got it half price.
b) No, your dad did.
c) After loudly mentioning the name of your blog a few times, no.


RESULTS

Mostly As

You're at a place that's been open a while, but it's still got cult status. You're there to appreciate good food, and no gimmicks. Go to Koya or your favourite secret place in Chinatown.

Mostly Bs

You like what you know, and judging by all of your friends' check-ins, you should go to Wagamama. And chilli squid isn't really edgy, by the way.

Mostly Cs

You were the first to predict the ramen craze, probably soon after you came back from a stag night in Hong Kong. You're at Bone Daddies, Tonkotsu or Shoryu every day, probably, sitting in the window.

*Just been pointed out to me that udon noodles aren't hand-pulled!

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